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You may have heard about this last week but today’s the day that some of the world’s biggest and dreamiest music fans imagine their lives are about to get better: Live Nation’s Festival Passport goes on sale soon. For $799, you can basically buy passes to every single festival in the world that sorta matters, even though, of course, you probably have a life and you wouldn’t actually be able to attend more than 3-4 of these. In which case maybe you’re still saving a few bucks, but duh just buy the passes to the festival like a normal person and leave this passport out of it.

Anyway, here’s the info on what you’d get for $799. Pretty impressive.

NORTH AMERICA

Austin City Limits Music Festival
Billboard Hot 100
Bonnaroo
Camp Bisco
CBC Music Festival
Center of Gravity
Chasing Summer
Chicago Open Air
Country LakeShake
Countdown
Contact Winter Music Festival
Crystal Coast Music Festival
Dreams Music Festival
Dreamstate
EDC Las Vegas
EDC Orlando
Electric Forest
Escape: Psycho Circus
Faster Horses
Field Trip Music and Arts Festival
Forecastle
Free Press Summer Festival
Governors Ball
FVDED in the Park
HARD Summer Music Festival
Jamboree in the Hills
Lollapalooza Chicago
Music Midtown
Nocturnal Wonderland
Ohana Fest
One Love Music Festival
Paradiso
Peach Music Festival
Route 91
Sasquatch!
Sloss Music And Arts
The Meadows Music & Arts Festival
The Roots Picnic
Trackside Music Festival
Voodoo Music + Arts Festival
Watershed

EUROPE

Barcelona Beach Festival
Citadel Festival
Community Festival
Copenhell
Creamfields
Creamfields Steel Yard
DCODE
Down the Rabbit Hole
Download Festival England
Download Festival Madrid
Download Festival Paris
Electric Picnic Music and Arts Festival
Findings Festival
Firenze Rocks!
Glasgow Summer Sessions
Graspop
Heartland Festival
I Love Techno Europe
I-Days Festival
Isle Of Wight Festival
Latitude Festival
Leeds Festival
Lollapalooza Berlin
Lollapalooza Paris
Lovebox Festival
Lowlands Festival
Main Square Festival
North Sea Jazz Festival
Parklife
Popaganda
Reading Festival
Rock am Ring
Rock im Park
Rock im Pott
Rock Werchter
Summerburst Gothenburg
Summerburst Stockholm
The Warehouse Project
TRNSMT Festival
TW Classic
V Festival
Way Out West
We Are Electric
Werchter Boutique
Wilderness Festival
Wireless Festival
Wireless Germany
Woo-Hah!

AUSTRALIA

Falls Festival

My favorite part is in the caveats:

The Festival Passport (“Pass”) is good toward general admission for participating 2017 festivals only, found at www.festivalpassport.com, subject to availability. Festivals are subject to change at any time. Not all festivals listed on livenation.com are participating festivals. Not valid toward parking fees. Pass holder must contact [email protected] to request campground space at least two (2) weeks in advance of each applicable festival. The Pass is not transferable. Must be 18 to purchase. The sale of the Pass or any tickets or wristbands obtained with the Pass, or any use of the Pass or tickets for unauthorized advertising, marketing or other promotional purposes, is strictly prohibited. Full Terms of Use apply. Pass can be revoked at any time for misconduct or violation of the Terms of Use.

LULZ “not valid toward parking fees” — THEY ALWAYS GET YOU SOMEHOW.